soleilfae: (huh)
[personal profile] soleilfae
Days are feeling like they are slipping by like water through my fingers. I blink and all of the sudden it's 7 at night and another day looms closer.

This depresses me. I know I'm thinking a lot about tomorrow. I'm thinking about whether I'll have a job for Sept. I'm thinking about seeing these two men I'm interested in. I'm thinking about the if's and maybe's of tomorrow and letting today fly away. This is a problem.

I know it's a problem, but at the same time I don't know what to do about it. I could get a plane ticket.. with having little money to depend on if a job doesn't pull through. I could drive to see the other, but he's crazy busy and always on the move. I could go hammer down the doors of the school district... but that could be viewed as terrifying.

I have been upping my game with the school and keeping in touch with the men as well as I can... Really it's not as much about actions as it is about mindset and I can't figure out how to get myself out of the rut of a mindset that I've fallen into. If I do or don't have a job come Sept I at least want to enjoy the free time I find myself with. Is that so hard... Always anticipating, not enjoying nearly enough.
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
Account name:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.


Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.


soleilfae: Woman of fire (Default)

July 2012

8 91011121314

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 20th, 2017 10:00 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios